I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
