You just made me feel so damn special
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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