What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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