Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Randomize
