You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
