i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
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