After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
Randomize
