Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
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