The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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