I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
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