She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
