I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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