He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
