i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
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