We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
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