i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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