if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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