No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize
