we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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