i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
I am spending my child support on dildos
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Gay?
German.
Pity.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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