I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
