How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
jump out the window naked night went bad
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
