What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
