dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
