I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Well when I got home you were sitting at the table eating cold, leftover taco meat. I'd say you were pretty far gone by that time.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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