forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
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I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
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You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Randomize