I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
Randomize
