He kissed a someone with a penis
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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