This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
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