dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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