I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
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Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
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That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
We'd like to invite you to our threesome! Lingerie is encouraged and drinks will be provided. Next Friday, roommate night, my bedroom. Hope to see you there!
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.