ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Just high enough for therapy.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
