Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
