so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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