I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize