We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
