when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
You don't make any sense
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