Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
