guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
