I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad