Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
