Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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