Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
