Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
