So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Randomize
