OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
he told me I talked like a deaf person
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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