mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
We're too hungover to prance.
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