dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
