I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
