This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize
